Sunday, January 11, 2015

Being "overwhelmed"

What to say when your mind is a rambling mess.

I've been thinking if only there was some forum where I could take this jumbled up tumble of yarn in my brain and make sense of it. Oh wait! I have something for that! The best part is, I don't need to edit and make it pretty. I can just throw all of my crap onto here and if you read it, that's your problem.

My brain; a self-portrait.

The other reason why I'm finally doing this is simple: procrastination. I have literally a gazillion trillion really really...necessary things I need to do, like solidify healthcare coverage, get a job, find a place to live, etc. So the best way to procrastinate is to write babbling nonsense and draw pictures.

Thoughts and decisions like this make me question how many people on a regular basis call me a "role model"; I'm going to guess not enough.

In conclusion, what I'm writing about is that feeling we call "overwhelmed". I put it in air quotes because "literally" every single word is better with "air quotes".

"poop"

Fact proven.

The way I've been dealing with this feeling of being "overwhelmed" is (in no particular order): 1: procrastination, 2: wine, 3: distractions, 4: exercise...(sometimes), 5: food (more often), and 6: just general freaking outery.

A more rational side of me says it might be better to just take things one thing at a time. The problem with this approach, albeit it logical, is when you do one thing, about 8 million more things pop up on your to-do list.

Oh don't get me started on to-do lists. I looooove me some to-do lists. Oh I got distracted again.

So I'll give you  an example of what I like to call a "Life F*ck You". I just made that up. I don't really call them that, but now I will.

I have spent approximately 6,843 hours on hold with insurance or the healthcare.gov people trying to figure out how to get insurance in the very probable case I get severely injured while attempting to cook something with more than 2 ingredients. Am 83% sure I will ironically die while waiting on hold with the health insurance companies.


Pretty much nailed the eybrows on this. #humblebrag

Back to the example, once you finally get signed up with insurance, you need to "send in proof" of something...what is that something? I DON'T KNOW because when I finally get all set up and click on the link that says what proof I need to send in...the link doesn't work. This is about when I start banging my head on the table.

Why isn't there a g-d map?!

I really really think it's some science experiment where they keep put out a piece of cheese right behind a wall, you tear through the wall after hard work and patience, and as you're about to grab the cheese (which isn't even cheese! It's me paying money for something boring like insurance!), a new glass wall just shoots up through the ground with a big F*CK YOU! written on it.

I know what you're thinking, can't you just go around the door? NO YOU CAN'T. so shut it.
But I might just be cynical. But I'm not, they're just fucking with me. I saw Lost, I know what's going on here. Also, if I got cheese after getting health insurance, I think it would be better. If I got cheese after completing every menial life task, I think it would all be better. Moral found, the end.

And you thought I wasn't romantic.